Ryan Slater - Online Memorial Website

Now I'm mad at you, what a mess I am.

I was pretty much angry all day yesterday. I had picked you up one year ago yesterday. I didn't even have a complete year with you home. Trying not to be angry, but I guess its there always just under the surface, no matter how hard I try or how busy I try to be or how much I pray. I'm still putting a lot of that energy into working out and training for the Spartan race for you.
I found a bunch of Angel moms and some who have lost their sons the way you went, which I still don't get or understand. They help because sometimes I feel that I am the only one. I am also sad that there are so many out there like me it makes my heart so heavy, just so very heavy to know there is that much pain, dispair, and grief out there.It's like I am not part of this life anymore, just going through the motions. It's awful, truly primal pain and grief.

I know this is not  very nice rant, but I had to, I just had to get it out there..it was too much to hold in:(

To all of Ryans True friends THANK YOU